It's the last first day

Tomorrow is the last first day of my undergraduate career. It's a frightening thought for me in so many ways. After this semester I really am on my own. Certainly, my father would help me out if I really needed it however, it's time for me to find my own feet and stand on my own. It's exhilarating and terrifying all at the same time. The journey to this moment has not always been easy. I've overcome obstacles, made mistakes, found myself, fallen apart, and pulled everything back together. However, here I am about to reach a new point. I'm me now. I go after what I want. I've loved and lost. I've stopped caring about what others think---to a certain extent. So I stand here now saying publicly for perhaps the first time that I'm scared about the future---truly scared. What if I don't get into graduate school? What if I don't get a job? What if I follow my heart? All these what if's are absolutely frightening for a planned to a t person like myself. However, I guess this is all part of growing up. The next few months will test me, I'm sure. They'll test my ability to think on my feet, make decisions that really matter, and be myself. I can't wait for the end but it's the ride in the middle that makes it all worthwhile.